Not an american single men

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  11. I do not want to run all over my husband. I want him to be in charge because he is capable of being in charge and will not allow me to run all over him, not because I reduce or restrain myself to allow him to be dominant.
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  13. I don't want pretense or pretend and get frustrated at having to be less so he can be more.
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  15. J's Girl, I understand your frustration and greatly sympathise.
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  17. On the other hand, (not sure if this applies to you, J's Girl, but your comment just made me think of it) those who are already married to a man might want to consider actively submitting, and giving the man as much experience of having authority and being obeyed as possible, because it is quite possible that a man could grow into taking a woman in hand this way.
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  19. For example, you could do things like asking him permission to do things, asking him when any decision needs to be made, and so on. Initially, it might feel really silly, and you might want to start slowly, but it seems entirely possible that taking such a course of action could help him get enough experience of being in charge to realise that he likes it.
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  21. And then, when he realises that he likes it, and starts to expect it, he may start taking you in hand of his own accord.
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  23. by Sarah Cavendish on 2005 Nov 3 - 01:22 | reply to this comment
  24. On the third hand
  25. Actively submitting is great, but pick your (non)battles. When you ask submissively whether to get 1/2 or 2/3 pound of sliced ham at the deli he's going to think that you're simply incompetent. A man who is accustomed to being in charge in other areas of life doesn't need to take charge of every detail of the relationship. Micro-managing details suggests mama's little boy, not an alpha male.
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  27. I think this article has a lot of truth to it....both in recognizing that some Taken In Hand women do enjoy being over powered by the man and that some other women do not find it necessary to be physically overwhelmed in the same way. Some women (and men) do need the physical manisfestation while others find more subtle and less physical forms of control equally if not more satisfying.
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